[open] They didn't have taro ice cream bars and I'm still vaguely butthurt.

[convictionary]

Who: Gaius (convictionary) and various and sundry other people, yes, it's ice cream time.
When: Post-Lasker intro log
Where: Lasker, starting off in an ice cream parlor because I can.
What: Investigating Lasker stuff while eating ice cream.
Rating: Probably some innuendo and mild cursing because it's me, and I might use a vulgar metaphor and/or analogy at some point.

[So, as Gaius stared at the ice cream bar shaped vaguely like Kaito's head (chocolate flavored) he couldn't help but say.]

That ain't right.

[They could get to Double Duo and doing other things in a second. Right now he's distracted by ice cream bars shaped like people he knew.]

Comments

[convictionary]

[Yeah, please don't. Not being Japanese aside, if he actually was called senpai and understood what it meant he'd both feel really bad (like he took advantage of someone and gravely misrepresented who he was as a person, and not in a good, advantageous way) and like he'd have to take a shower to wash off his shame. Seriously, who leaves him alone with people.]

They didn't have things like this when I first got here. Nobody cared about us...

[...]

...you know. [It feels weird to call yourself a hero.] Help me look.

[sealeted]

I see. Am I looking for anybody in particular?

[Hakuno obligingly steps closer and begins sifting through the treats, completely clueless as to who most of these likenesses belong to. She knows less than ten people, most of them by sight.]

[convictionary]

Yeah. Me. Look, if you're probably ice cream the least you gotta do is find out what flavor you are. And...lookie here, Adra's red bean.

[Look at that package. It's our friendly neighborhood cranky elf, in disturbing ice cream bar form complete with bubblegum eyes. He is setting it aside as he's never had red bean ice cream.

...

Listen.]

[sealeted]

If you say so.

[What? Oh, come on.

Does it look like she's judging you? Is this blank, bottomless stare a critical one? Is the piercing light in her eyes throwing you off?]

I suppose that suits Sensei. If you had to guess, what flavor would you want to be?

[convictionary]

[...]

Something good. I'll never live it down if I'm something like...gods, vanilla.

[He's vanilla.]

[sealeted]

So, about that.

[Hakuno shifts something behind her back, glancing away in second-hand disappointment.]

Hypothetically, what if you were vanilla. With gingerbread. Possibly.

[convictionary]

Nah. Can't be. [He has faith that will be shattered in five seconds.] With my hair I gotta be...gods, cherry?

[...]

Maybe orange. [...unsure about being orange sherbet or something like that, but at least it's not vanilla. With gingerbread. Which, thinking about it, is actually rather specific and he's looking at her now with dawning suspicion.]

[sealeted]

...sorry. Gaius, right?

[Hakuno figures that's his name, because that's what's plastered across the package of his unfortunately vanilla copy. She tries for consolation.]

Um, if it makes you feel better, I think that sounds tasty.

[The gingerbread. Not his name.]

[convictionary]

[...just for that he's going to use the five fingered discount to steal her an ice cream bar. Not that he's going to admit it yet.]

It's no chocolate, but it's something, at least. Thanks.

[...]

[sealeted]

[...Gaius are you absolutely, positively, 100% sure that you have never been summoned into the aquatic hell that was the Holy Grail War? Are you sure?]

No, sorry I couldn't have been more helpful. Is there anybody else you want to see?

[convictionary]

[Of course not.

One: he's a shoddy shot.

Two: he's got a brown bird, not a blue one.

Three, and most importantly: his future son is in Blanc, which means that at some point in Gaius' life he'll experience the voluntary sexy touch of another human being opposed to running off into the forest, polishing his bow and ineffectually firing off arrows from his quiver by himself, and then dying young.]

Not off the top of my head. [...well, the gingerbread saves it from the worst, he guesses. Sigh.] Anybody look tasty?

[sealeted]

[Just had to check.]

Well, Gilgamesh's apparently has chunks of cheesecake, but not even that is enough to tempt me.

[Even if she had money, he'd find out. Somehow. And he would never let Hakuno hear the end of it.]

Oh, Vietnam has matcha-flavored ice cream.

[convictionary]

Don't put him in your mouth. He'd enjoy it too much and you'd never hear the end of it. Had him as a roommate for a spell.

[Yes, they are about to uncork the bottle known as 'shared Gilgamesh experiences.' He's also going to purchase a...

Let's say a Wukong because Gaius is going to live on the edge and lift a random ice cream bar while the shopkeeper's back is turned while he's at it. They gotta move fast on the last one 'cause a melting thing is the last thing you want to hide in your white trousers.]

[sealeted]

You don't have to tell me twice. Also, I've been in that situation before.

[She pauses, casually watching his slight of hand. Then, something seems to occur to her.]

The room-sharing ordeal, I mean. I've never seen Gilgamesh-style foods before.

[Or put her mouth on him in any other sense, though she refrains from emphatically proclaiming that part to the store at large.]

[convictionary]

...

[...]

...the gold guy who goes around talking about how the world is his and has a boner for his boner?

[Making sure that she doesn't mean some other Gilgamesh.]

[sealeted]

The version summoned in my Grail War, yeah. Not exactly the same, since the one here has different memories, even if he looks and acts the same. But if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, insults people like a duck...

[She gives a little shrug.]

[convictionary]

Sounds about right. [And they're out and-] Here. [Enjoy whatever flavor was liberated from the confines of the ice cream place before it gets melted and unfortunate. He's going to eat a Wukong. Nom.] Sweet.

[sealeted]

Oh, thanks.

[You just handed her a Vietnam, so she's happy. Her face still isn't the most expressive around, but there's a glow in her cheeks and a sparkle in her eye once she sinks her teeth into the nice, cold treat.]

[convictionary]

Anytime-...

[...

At this point he'd throw in an actual friendly nickname but there's something about her that's utterly...generic, but he can't say that so there's an awkward nickname shaped hesitation.]

Figured I couldn't be the only one eating. And everybody loves ice cream. [He's also going to noticeably move them away from the parlor before someone looks outside and notices that he engaged in some petty theft.]

[sealeted]

Careful making offers like that. I might just take you up on that.

[She follows after him without comment, still happily savoring her treat. It occurs to her, once they're a few streets away that he...





--doesn't actually know her name! She learned his via ice cream, and forgot to return the favor. Oops.]

Oh, I'm Hakuno by the way.

[convictionary]

Hakuno?

[Didn't he hear that name before? (No, spoilers, he didn't, he's mistaking it for something else, but he's going to wonder about that for a few seconds.)]

Hak...nah. Got a question for you. You got any other names you go by?

[sealeted]

Well, my Carrier handle is Hakunon if that's what you mean.

[She wipes a smear of cream from her lower lip and licks it off the pad of her thumb. She's... She's not going to bring up 'mongrel,' 'Little Squirrel,' or any of the other more colorful monikers she's collected. Nothing doing.]

Why do you ask?

[convictionary]

Nothing major, Hakuno. [Though he'll remember that and her carrier'll be harassed somewhere down the line. Look forward to it.

They're now heading towards the Double Duo arena, even if he has fuck knowledge of what lays ahead of them.] Just figuring something out. What did the bosses give you for a weapon?

[Segue! From...trying to drum up a nickname if at all possible, possibly not, she might end up earning her own section on the list.]

[sealeted]

[Hakuno, poor trusting fool that she is, continues to let him lead. She certainly doesn't know these streets better than him.]

Oh, a bow. It can infuse poison into whatever arrows I manage to buy. It's... a work in progress, since I've never used one before.

[convictionary]

[Unbeknownst to the both of them they'll be encountering hero body pillows and a hero otaku shop in the next few moments, so also look forward to that.] Nice. I got a- [He flips out a candy cane from...good question and offers it to her, if she's so curious.] Don't lick it if you're thinking about it.

[Probably not, but...he needs to warn people about it, okay?]