WAR ♞ MARCH ON CENTRAL WEST PLATEAU

[boardmaster]

MARCH ON CENTRAL WEST PLATEAU
20 AUGUST (GLADIA) 2016

The quiet, seemingly unremarkable town of Friedgood doesn't seem like a prime target for a Noir attack. Ask any outsider what a Friedgood local's favorite activity might be, and they’ll likely respond "I don't know, digging?" They're not wrong: Friedgood's primary industry comes from the excavation of precious stones and minerals in the nearby mountain ranges and volcanoes. Those who don't make their living from mining most likely still enjoy digging, as the town is a hot destination for archeologists from the school of Pigeonsblood looking to uncover the ancient secrets of Gammon.

More important than shiny rocks, however, is Friedgood's strategic location within the country, specifically the checkpoint known as Platform 42 and 5/8ths. It forms a stark contrast to the sleepy town it resides in. This bustling travel hub is known as the "Gateway to Gammon", and boasts fast transport to almost anywhere in the kingdom. Security is tight here, with grim-faced Gammon soldiers working around the clock to ensure that criminal activity doesn't stand a chance. Keep your contraband at home — an infraction will cost you heavy jail time. Friedgood is also the only town with a road providing access to Grantebrycge, Gammon's illustrious University town.

By conquering Friedgood, Noir hopes for universal access to all of Gammon.

On the 20th of Gladia, amidst strong winds and persistent thunderstorms, Heroes will arrive to the Central West Plateau. Even surrounded by tall mountain ranges and ominous volcanoes, its ancient wall is truly a daunting sight. A marvel even by modern construction standards, it was built over 300 years ago to defend against hostile nomadic tribes, and remains as strong and sturdy as the day it was built. It also provides an important environmental buffer to the people of Friedgood — the wall is resistant to lava.

Basic info on the war can be found here. All OOC questions about the event may be directed to the thread below.

ONE ♙ The War of Three Armies
It’s time to head to the battle, Hero. You may be walking, riding a mount - your own, or a borrowed spider or boar - or hitching a ride from someone else. It’s a miserable trek to the plateau, but at least you’re not alone. Once you arrive, Verdoni is there to greet you, accompanied by another Gammonian, the commander of this battle.

Pinta [ so god damned salty about not being a naval tactician and assigned to ships ] Ah, yes, the vaunted Heroes I’ve heard so much about. The name is Pinta, ah... naval tactician to Gammon’s armed forces. Ask why and I’ll show you a bloody hell. Anyway, welcome to the Central West Plateau! During ancient times, the volcanoes were said to be a wall of flame that protected Gammon. But if that stopped the Othellians, I suppose I wouldn’t be here, ahaha! Now, with them dormant, we must instead rely upon our steel and our wall. It’s strong enough to protect Gammon even if every volcano in the area were to erupt all at once! At least that’s what the locals say. They didn’t sound too dodgy, but... moving on! If you have any questions, our men will be glad to explain; show you how the cannons work, where the traps are and whatnot. Again, this really isn’t my expertise—oh! Our wizards have been creative as of late. We’ve these wind platforms that will fling those Noirs up, up, up! Into the air! Try not to get caught in them, yeah? Our navy will take care of our seas. They’re an outstanding lot, they are. All we need to do is focus! Gammon shall not sink here!

You’ll then be handed a magical bracelet. The miners use it protect them from toxic air, so this is a precaution; should you need it, it should last for the duration of the battle. Now all you have to do is wait and prepare for the battle. Acquaint yourself with the battleground: explore the Defense Wall and see what traps there are. It may give you some ideas of your own. There are also war cannons aligned on the top wall and within its interior. Otherwise, check your supplies or rest and collect yourself for what will come. Your mount may also want attention.


TWO ♙ Fellowship of the Bling
Initially cloaked by thick fumes of sulfur, ozone and the dreary overcast of the storm, the Noir battalion finally arrives. Their general, Spicy Spice, steps, nay, struts forward.

	Why is it that every time I come around, that Cochrane Bridge wants to go down? [ ADJUSTS HER WORLD CUP BRA ] They can’t keep that wall up forever.
Let’s make this a quick one, so we can get out of this smelly rain! [ gets ready to fire her gun in the air when she remembers something ] And don’t forget, target their puny pathetic healers, first. [ raises gun high above her head, signaling for the attack with a BANG! ]

On her cue, the Noir Vanguard rushes forward with a fearsome war cry, followed soon after by the Rearguard.

ENEMY ♟ Mounted Noir Soldier
Weak against None	Strong against Fire	Immune to None
These soldiers gallop onto the battlefield with their imposing GOLDHORN GOAT mounts. These are bigger and stronger than the average goat, and their golden horns tend to ABSORB SPELLS directed at their riders. Some spells in a soldier’s arsenal: GRISTRELKI sets fire to the rain — literally. It converts the rain in the sky into a barrage of fireballs. Pray your umbrella’s fireproof! With the PLAMEVODA spell, they can turn hot water (i.e. those from geysers) into bubbling hot lava. When combined with a strong cooling spell, the spell can trap you in rock… That is, if the lava doesn’t kill you first! DVIZHE SMERTI is a dangerous spell that paralyzes its target, rendering them unable to even speak or blink. This can be cured with mana exchange. Hurry before Noir strikes with a rain of fire!Of course, the soldiers are capable of HEALING SPELLS to assist their injured allies and mounts. The VANGUARD is lead by an impressive wall of massive shield units, armed with various melee weapons: swords, maces, and daunting battle axes. Herd them into the traps around the battlefield to render them immobile! The REARGUARD, armed with bows and arrows, will try to overwhelm the HEROIC VANGUARD. HEROIC DEFENSE back them up with long-ranged attacks and the cannons! If they get close enough to the wall, the Rearguard will relentlessly attack the Defense! Both units are under strict orders to prioritize an attack on the HEROIC SUPPORT. If they see any Hero or Gammonian soldiers helping each other or performing rescues on the battlefield, they will give chase IMMEDIATELY. DROPS: Shield with Noir Emblem, Flame Staff, Assorted Non-Magical Weapons, Golden Goat Horns, Lava Lamp

In the heat of battle, you will feel the ground beneath you shake and tremble. In a turn of events neither side could have predicted, a dormant volcano in the distance erupts, raining down fire and scorched earth on the area. More alarming, however, is how the resulting earthquake sets off powerful, white-hot geysers on the battlefield. Stay alert! To make matters worse, the approaching lava makes Noir’s fire spells even more deadly, and Noir shows no signs of letting up on their assault.

Spicy Spice You think a little bad weather is going to stop us? Don't make me laugh. [ laughs anyway, then falls into a coughing fit ] Urghh, damn these fumes — Oh whatever, Send in the riders!

THREE ♙ The Desolation of Noir
Undeterred by the eruptions, the geysers, or the bad weather, they’ve called in their aerial units, fierce griffon riders who’re trying to fly over the wall and into Friedgood. Don’t let them pass! Make use of your resources and shoot them down: Heroes with long ranged weapons or magic will find their skills useful here. Learned how to fire a cannon? Now’s your chance! If not, protect your allies, Hero and Gammonian, as they line up their shots.

ENEMY ♟ Noir Griffon Rider
Weak against None	Strong against Fire, Lightning	Immune to Wind
For the first time, Heroes will witness firsthand how Noir’s legendary griffon riders—often called masters of the skies—live up to their name. A griffon’s powerful wings not only lets them soar at great heights; they can whip up terrifying BEAMS OF LIGHTNING. Griffon riders are armed with JAVELINS which they can also throw and cast the same spells as their counterparts on land. However, they share a closer bond with their griffon mounts. Upon losing their master, the griffons will go BERSERK and proceed to kill everything in sight. If a Hero gets caught in a griffon’s talons, the creature will drop them into their boiling demise at either a GEYSER or VOLCANO. DROPS: Mount Treats, Riding Gloves, Noir Lance, Harness, Griffon Feathers, Griffon Talon

The lava is fast approaching and Noir can no longer take the heat. The griffon riders are maintaining their assault, but the rest of their army is falling back to escape. Time for you to retreat too before Gammonian soldiers seal the wall and you’re trapped on the plateau side. Fried Heroes ain’t Fried Good.

• Defense, continue shooting at any enemy target in range! Be attentive and aid your allies as they retreat back to the wall. Do not fear, you have the advantage.
• Vanguard, fall back! Watch the skies for any griffon riders on the way to the wall. Once you arrive, take down enemies who try to breach. Letting even one enemy pass could spell disaster.
• Support, grab the wounded and check the wall’s condition! Any damages should be repaired immediately to prevent the lava from entering Friedgood.

FOUR ♙ There and Back Again
The wall closes, sealing the lava and ending the battle. Hopefully no one got left behind.

Spicy Spice Now I'm wishing that I didn't wear these shoes (I hate heels). Better get up out my face! [ trips on her way out ] Oh shit!

Catch your breath, Hero. You won. First, check up on everyone and heal your wounds. If you borrowed a mount you might want to take the time to say farewell, since the trip back to Friedgood means you’ll be parting soon.

The people of Friedgood are grateful. They know what would have happened if you lost. There’s no time for fancy parties. They’re pulling out whatever they can find for a makeshift street party right then and there.

You can find bowls of Splotched Richard - a dessert pudding - and Bangers and Mash. If you’re in the mood for something strong you can get pints of Guileless or Pale Noir, maybe a Lasker Train Bomb if you can find someone who’s willing to mix it. Or perhaps you fancy a CreamAle, the favored drink of Grantebrycge.

You’re welcome to stay out and party as long as you like - the party is for you, after all! In fact, the people will respect you more if you get drunk and pass out on the side of the street. But for Heroes who’re tired from the war, you’re always welcome to stagger into the Bollox Inn for a room, free of charge.

Comments

[femmefailtale]

[Yeah. Caren is definitely at least that crazy.]

[And it seems Meliora's decided to be upset after her initial bout of scandal.]

Are you freaking daft, woman?! There is a time and a place!

[showsnopiety]

[Oh Meliora, she thought she might be.]

There's always a time and place for panties.

[And just for that, she moves to make a high kick to knock one of the goats that have gotten too close.

Is Caren messing with her? Maybe. Because she's wearing booty shorts.]

[femmefailtale]

[Meliora looked. She totally looked. It's incredibly apparent in her face that she looked.]

[And she is linefacing so hard right now. Darn you, Caren. Darn youuuuu.]

Gods, do you have a setting that isn't 'troll?' [Still, she's pointing her gun at the leg of another goat and firing it off. Turns out three-legged goats are not very good at standing, and that's going for a tumble.]

I'm betting 'no.'

[showsnopiety]

[What a little pervert, she looked. And Caren bit back a chuckle when she saw the look on Mel's face. Go into battle without protection? After riding a boar? How silly.

Caren does another kick-a spin kick that topples the goat to the ground with a bleat.]

Of course I do. But you're a long way away from unlocking the other settings.

[femmefailtale]

So what you're saying is that I need to do more grinding.

[She says as she kicks a rider in the face, stealing their flail and flinging it at a charging goat. The chain catches its legs, tangling them up as it trips. Gotta at least pretend to have her act together, otherwise she'll get made fun of.]

Why didn't you just say so~?

[showsnopiety]

Something like this, yes.

[And down goes another goat. Out comes the shawl, and Caren really starts to attack in earnest, a gorey dance of things getting smashed in with her fists, feet, and cloth.]

It'll take awhile though. I wanted to leave you with some hope in your life.

[femmefailtale]

[It's right about there that Meliora decides that things are a little too bloody for her to stay in close proximity--since Caren is drawing all of the attention Meliora takes it upon herself to sort of back away and snipe at targets of opportunity, aiming for the goats rather than the people upon them.]

Well, if that's how you want to do things. Better hope I don't find someone else I'd rather grind for in the meanwhile. That won't be my fault. Just sayin'.

[The ridiculousness of this conversation is helping her compartmentalize away from the part where she's somehow become engaged in a bloody skirmish, since if she acts like a cocksure badass then clearly she must actually have confidence, right? Right.]

[showsnopiety]

[Yeah, that's one of the problems when Caren decides to go all out and not care about the mess-especially in close combat. She's no knight, but she does pack a nasty punch. It's actually kind of fun to listen to the bones crack.

Maybe if she hits them in a certain way, she can make a song out of it?]

No, not your fault. If you want someone easy, you'll go for someone easy. It's quite a natural thing to want.

[Well, Meliora isn't peeing herself so...points in her favor?]

[femmefailtale]

[That is a lot of crushing of bones and whipping of asses--her first instinct was right: Caren is not to be fucked with.]

[She's still taking what shots are available, but a whirlwind of death she isn't... though she does have the bright idea to tilt the earth up just a little underneath one of the goats, to tip them into the horrible death radius.]

[--she'll just. Not eat for the next day or two or six. No big.]

Can't say you're wrong about that. Most of the time, the easy way to do somethin's the best way to do it too.

[showsnopiety]

[Caren has been training pretty hard these past few months to be a deadly force. But if she were another person, she might be a little...surprised at how efficient she is. Soon enough the bodies are piling up, and she has to back off.

Mostly to catch her breath and to get a good glance at Mel to make sure she's not being overwhelmed.]

The only reward of something easy is that it's easy.

[femmefailtale]

Matter of opinion!

[For her part, Meliora is doing just fine--though not through any real strength of her own. Instead, she's been using her gun to tag enemies from a distance, using her weapon as a lever with Caren as its fulcrum, circling and weaving around her horrible death radius and luring enemies into it, or forcing them to go around her in a manner so telegraphed that she can easily evade them. She's letting Caren do the heavy lifting while just supporting her from afar--such that by the time Caren has to stop to take a breath there's not a lot else for Meliora to do but mop up the one or two remaining riders with additional gunfire, knocking the legs out from the goats and then popping them in the torso.]

[Meliora's far from strong, but she's actually pretty good on a battlefield. She's definitely breathing hard from the mana exertion, though...]

Some of the best things I've ever done were easy as pie!

[showsnopiety]

[Sassy little thing when she's nervous, isn't she? But Caren doesn't mind too much, considering. She was half distracted and wanted to get her breath back as it was. But...in any cause, she's done the heavy lifting for now, and she's going to take a breather while she can.

Even if it means she's listening to Mel busting a few caps...and torsos.]

Were the easy things eating pie?

[Just wanting to know, and eyeing her too. Looks like someone is wavering on her feet...]

[femmefailtale]

Sometimes! Other times it's having tea! [Yeah, she's definitely feeling heavier--even the oxygen doping from being so much closer to sea level and in so much thicker air than she's used to (or physiologically adapted for) isn't enough to make up for the loss of her mana reserves. It's a completely unfamiliar type of tired, but one she fights through, wobbling for a second before digging her nails into her arm to wake herself up.]

[Gotta look strong. Can't project weakness. Gotta' keep up. If you can't keep up...]

[Or so she's thinking, as a rider manages to get behind her with a mace. She hears the clop of its hooves, turning and trying to draw a bead on him. She's not fast enough. The first swing goes over her head as she ducks beneath it, the sudden movement throwing Meliora off balance as she staggers forward. A hoof comes up, the goat trying to stamp on her as she rolls beneath it. Thinking fast, she reaches up and clings to the underside of the goat, smirking for a moment as both rider and goat alike buck and try to get her off. She does roll off in the end, but only when a geyser beneath her is about to blow, boiling both goat and rider.]

[She takes a deep breath, relaxing for only a moment before the boiled rider (blown off by the force of the water) lands right on top of her.]

...Okay.

Calling bullshit on this one. Utter bullshit.

[showsnopiety]

[Caren would have said something but-well. Can't do mana exchange while looking all cocksure right? And then...that...

Well.

Caren gaps a little, but mostly she's mentally popcorning this whole mini event. It's not every day you out goat a goat, even an enchanted one.]

I think you want to call that one goatshit.

[Especially since, you know. She's likely covered in goat hair by now.]

[femmefailtale]

Not... funny. [She slowly shoves the rider off of her and stands up, overheated and achey and sore and tired. And yes, there's goat hair on her.]

But yeah, goatshit is a good word for it.

Thinkin' it's getting close to time for me to retreat. I'm not used to fightin' tired...

The hell even is this?

[showsnopiety]

Being tired would be death here. Come. I'll escort you.

[And get some food and water for herself, though she wouldn't say that out loud. Vulnerable? What's that?]

And I believe that was avoiding goat shit in a battle.

[femmefailtale]

Yeah, alright. [She takes a few steps over towards Caren, willing herself to keep on standing.]

[She can keep going, it's not like moving requires all... that much mana.]

Just keep an eye out for enemies. I've got senses myself, but even they're feelin' a little dull. Definitely retreat time, if you dig me.

[showsnopiety]

[Caren eyes her. She might have to carry her, if things keep going as they do.]

I understand, and you don't have to worry. I am keeping an eye out on what's going on around us.

[She offers a thin smile.]

If you're lucky, I can steal another goat.

[femmefailtale]

[She forces herself to keep going, on two feet. Being tired is no excuse! Gotta keep up. Gotta keep up. She doesn't want to let herself be a burden--burdens get left behind.]

A goat would be nice. Or an airship.

I'm never lucky, though, so we're probably walkin'.

[showsnopiety]

[She glances back. She's moving way too slowly, and that's just begging for her to get speared through the back. Caren might be low, herself, but she's also used to wariness and pain. It's just how life was like before.]

Correction: I will be jogging.

[She's coming back around and...if Mel doesn't stop her, someone is going to be slung onto her shoulder and carried off.]

[femmefailtale]

[She's grabbed, but she immediately tries shoving Caren off of her. It's not strong, since she's not a rook herself, but it's definitely there and pronounced.]

Then I'll be jogging too. [And from how she's bristling... Meliora's clearly upset at the very idea of being carried.]

[showsnopiety]

[She lets her, though she does raise her eyebrows at the reaction. It's not because she doesn't want to be touched...rather...]

Meliora. What is your rank?

[femmefailtale]

Pawn. I'm a pawn. That doesn't mean I can't keep up, same as anyone else.

[She's just a little dizzy. She can still run. She has to.]

[showsnopiety]

It means that your reserves are low, so anyone can take a shot at you and you'd die.

I am a rook. I am built to endure, and to ensure that everyone, not just you, will get where they want to go safely.

I will not tease you. This is natural. And either you can keep your pride and die, or you can swallow it and let me do my job.

[femmefailtale]

[Logically, she knows Caren's right. But 'logic' has nothing to do with it.]

If my reserves are low, then I'll run. If I can't run, I'll crawl. If I can't do that, I'll slither along by pulling with my godsdamn teeth.

[She remembers being covered in garbage. The white-hot in her leg. The sureness that someone would be there to help her any second--they have to notice.]

I'll keep up. I have to keep up. I'm gonna' live, and I'm gonna' do it on my own godsdamn terms.

[Nobody came. Even when they knew, no one came. She's alone. Utterly alone, and she won't depend on anyone because she's alone.]

[And if she can't keep up... Even right now, now that she has the same power everyone else does, if she can't keep up even when the playing field is finally level and she can finally act on her own, she really would be better off dead.]

Even if you can endure so much better than a normal Pawn, so what?! I can endure just fine too! I'm not some kid you have to coddle!