pawnstorm | Late It's-Not-July-Anymore Catch-All!

Who: Lux Crownguard, and you!
When: Backdated to the later half of Delphine (post-dungeon)
Where: Caissa & Petrosian
What: Late month shenanigans and overflow for July's intro! Job listings that didn't make the last catch all (harvest soon, wonderwall), plus a few other prompts. If you want something specific, message me at

sheepyton!
Ratings: PG for the most part, but will change this if need be.
Warnings: None currently

♕ o1. SEEING DOUBLE (HALL OF GLORY).

[ Walking around the dorms, you might find that your eyes are playing tricks on you. Did you just see something strange out of the corner of your eye? A trick of the light, maybe? A vague shimmering, just out of your peripheral vision. Blink and its gone, however. Or was it even truly there? Spooky. ]

[ Yikes, where did that voice come from?! Suddenly from behind, Lux stands there, smiling as she almost always does, her head quirked slightly to one side. Curious, the bracelet on her wrist appears to be glowing..? ]

♕ o2. "FINE" ART (CAISSA).

[ What... what was she looking at exactly? Wandering around the Lucena Museum, soaking in all of the grandeur that Gammonian art had to offer (a good magician surrounds herself in as many strange and wonderful things as she can, after all), Lux was left more confused than anything.

She just didn't get art. Not at all.

Great sculptures and paintings of heroes past, sure, she can get into that. But here, she was stumped. It was a bit too weird. So, attempting to look like a good connoisseur of art, turning her head this way and that to try to at least somewhat analyze each piece, she found herself looking more and more confused. What was she even looking at here? She wasn't sure... ]

♕ o3. SOMEONE STOP THIS CRAZY THING! (PETROSIAN).

[ So weeding? Not her thing. A noble city girl born and bred, she hardly knew what a day out on the fields were like, and after taking about an hour to get a small area of land weeded, some poor farm hand took pity upon her.

She could work a tractor, right? Sure she could! Anyone can! Seriously, just... go do something. Here, take the keys to that tractor over there. There was no way she could get into trouble with that, the darned thing hasn't worked in years— ]

WATCH OUT!

[ Judging from the giant cloud of shimmering black smoke careening forward on the horizon, she's "fixed" the tractor! Well, "fix" being a relative term, at least. It's running. Chugging and sputtering, bucking against the spell she placed on it to make it run, the machine managed to wrest dominance from the young mage's hands, and had a score to settle apparently.

Poor thing, she's holding on for her dear life. THIS WAS NOT WHAT SHE HAD IN MIND. ]

♕ o4. A HOME AWAY FROM HOME (CAISSA).

[ What started off as a routine shopping trip has taken a significant detour. She intended to only go out looking for a calendar—something simple that she could use to keep track of holidays (and perhaps a few birthdays, while she was at it), but managed to get sidetracked along the way. A bit of window shopping never hurt anyone, right?

...And her room was a bit barren, wasn't it?

Moving between shops, the blond would occasionally stop, looking at something, picking it up and turning it over, before inevitably putting it back. Was she looking for something specific? ]

♕ o5. HELL'S KITCHEN (CAISSA).

[ The farmers in Petrosian had been nice enough to gift any and all heroes that helped them with produce from their crops, and Lux was no exception. But what would she do with all of this? She couldn't eat it all herself, it would go bad before she got to it. And you know, it might be nice to share with others. Yeah!

Cooking didn't seem so hard, she could probably handle it. And after convincing a few of the maids that she wanted to make something in the kitchen, and no it was all right she could manage herself, Lux went to work.

At first, it seemed fine. But after a while, a strange smell began to waft through the cafeteria. Then strange noises—pots clanking, worried mumblings ~~NO YOU GET BACK INTO THAT POT SO HELP HER~~. This is fine. Everything is fine. It didn't have to look perfect, right? I-it's the thought that counts, right?

If you choose to not intervene, she will continue her battle in the kitchen, for better or for ill.

Wandering out into the cafeteria, a large pot and lid in her arms, she looked harried. Like she had just seen a terrible crime take place in front of her. Her face somewhat smudged with... lord, what even was that, gravy? Were those scorch marks on her apron? Looking around, she spies a ~~victim~~ person. ]

[ Run. Dear lord, run. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

My, I had no idea that you were so judgmental. If I didn't know any better, I would say that you have something against giraffes.

[ Well, if she was going to laugh, it seemed like it might be mildly at his expense, a small giggle escaping her. ]

And just because he doesn't have thumbs doesn't mean he can't get anything done. For all we know, he could be an upstanding citizen in his community. Maybe he detonated that bowl to make sure that his other long-necked brethren wouldn't get hurt by it in the future. Did you think of that?

Me? I got nothing against a giraffe.

[Though he does lean in closer to the artwork, studying it for several seconds before he straightens up, slamming a fist into his open palm.]

So what you're sayin' is, we don't know enough about the geopolitics of the giraffe culture depicted here to make a sound judgment on the events depicted herein. That the giraffes might be contendin' with some kinda long drawn out war, and resources are getting stretched pretty thin. So the giraffe's enemies, lions, probably, in this case, are resorting to real dirty tactics, like plantin' bombs in these peaceful giraffe villages fulla little thumbless giraffe women and children, and the other giraffes, well, they can't have that, can they?

Especially when they're trying to blow up the sacred Fruit Bowl of Peace, the symbol of all that's good 'n giraffey in the world. So our hero here, he figures out the plan and gets the whole village to evacuate, but there's no time for him to make it clear of the blast. What the artist has done here is capture the culmination of decades of war and strife and lion aggression in a single perfect moment of giraffey heroism, so that all who gaze upon it can remember this single, beautiful moment of self-sacrifice as a reminder that even in the middle of a war, there's still room for goodness?

Is that about it?

[ She turns her head and stares silently at Lavi as he goes into his spiel, and well after.

She steeples her fingers a bit, a flicker of a mischievous smile playing on her lips. ]

But how would the lions be able to plant bombs in the giraffe villages without being noticed. You would think that even the giraffe villagers would notice even a few lion soldiers within their ranks. Unless...

[ Wait for it. ]

Gorilla tactics! That would be the only way! The lions must have had some kind of alliance with the gorillas!

[Wait. Did she seriously just...? He stares at her with a look that's probably quite close to the way she was just looking at him.]

That... That's... [He buries his face in his hands Is he laughing or crying...]

Lux... [He looks up at her with the biggest grin.] That was perfect! Why didn't you tell me you were sittin' on such good lines?

[ And now she was laughing as well, a fit of giggles overtaking her, her face practically beaming. Someone who actually appreciates her ~~terrible~~ sense of humor, how rare! ]

I don't know, it just came to me. I'm sorry!

[ She wipes a few tears from her eyes. Oh, she hadn't laughed like this in a while. ]

[He laughs too, half at what a terrible line it truly was, and half because of how amused she is at her own bad joke in the first place. He waves his hands, still chuckling.]

Don't be sorry-- I just wasn't expecting it, is all. You really surprised me-- Usually, nobody appreciates that kinda humor, you know? I'll have to remember to try 'n stay on my toes around you when it comes to saying silly things.

Tell me about it! Some people have the worst taste when it comes to humor.

[ Says the woman that just pulled that line. Lux, you may want to look in a mirror for once. ]

But please, I'm normally not that funny. You set me up rather well, though.

S'true-- nobody appreciates a good joke like they should and that's a shame.

[He shakes his head, laughing much quieter now.] Only 'cause you went along with it to begin with. I'm glad though. It's good to have a chance to laugh a little sometimes, yeah?

[ Finally, someone who gets it! And she had you pegged totally different the first time they met, Lavi. It just goes to show that you should never judge a book by its cover. ]

With everything that has happened up to this point, I couldn't agree more. It's easy to get caught up in everything—being taken from your home, the war. It's nice to be able to laugh like this.

[ Although she has so few people back home that she could joke like this with. Was there really anyone of note?

Let's not think about that. ]

Although I doubt that the Gammonian locals would appreciate us poking fun like this.

[He smiles; it's an easy one, practiced and relaxed. It doesn't matter what war it is, it's all the same at the core, but somehow, in the past couple of years, he's gotten more attached to the idea that maybe there can occasionally be moments of "okay" even in a war.]

Laughing's the good part, that's for sure. You're right though, don't think they'd be too appreciative of this conversation. If I end talkin' to anybody about their art, I'm gonna have to get creative with my praise.

[ The idea of war was still a novel concept to her, something that was both a part of her everyday life, yet still felt somehow detached from it. The aftermath of Lasker still lingering, it still seemed... distant somehow. ]

But thinking about it, I'm not sure they would even know what a giraffe is, so you're probably safe. In this case...

[ Curling a hand at her chin, she considered for a moment. ]

Maybe something about a majestic unicorn prancing toward the setting sun? That might be a bit more relatable.

Edited 2016-08-12 05:20 (UTC)

[That's fair, even back in his world, most people haven't seen a giraffe in person. But he has to consider for a moment. Unicorns don't actually exist, not where he's from.]

Unicorns're more relatable? Really? [But why not, all sorts of things that should be impossible are real, here.] I guess I didn't consider that, but I think they're gonna be unhappy with a review no matter what. This is a good time for just sugarcoatin' everything, cause people can be touchy about their art.

[ Lux has only heard stories herself, and seen a few drawings from time to time. Strange creatures. ]

Relatable, no, but most people see them as pure-hearted, courageous creatures.

...Although I suppose that might be an insult here, too.

[ Her expression sours. Don't ask, Lavi. ]

Yes. People can get needlessly sensitive when it comes to interpreting something that they view as sacred or important, even if we don't quite understand it ourselves. It's good to remember that.

Late It's-Not-July-Anymore Catch-All!

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