[Open] The Mapo Tofu affair

[showsnopiety]

Who: Everyone! If you can smell it, you can find it!
When: 6/8-610
Where: Hall of Glory Parlour in Caissa
What: Caren found out she can make mapo tofu and is sharing with everyone. Heaven help us all.
Rating: So far none but will change when things happen.





THe Halls of Glory smell a little different today. Instead of the usual fare that the others might know from the weekly menu, there's a different scent. Something that may remind heroes of Airy, Ma Jiang dishes, or maybe, more simply, of home.

This was the result of Caren's cooking and some hunting on her part. And the results may be quite appealing. There are pots of rice, still steaming, and various bowls filled with the result known as mapo tofu. Some of them are spicer then others, and she hasn't seen fit to label which are very spicy, and which are quite mild. The only thing she has labelled, with a rim of green around the bowls, are the vegan variations, for those who can't, or do not, eat meat or meat by products.

Consider it a game of spice roulette. Because there are other bowls as well, with crushed cucumber-hot pepper salad, spicy tofu, and something that has spewed spinach and garlicy noodles within. But hey! You may be able to cool off with one of the pots of tea around the place-or with one of the rare tubs of ice cream of various flavors, kept chilled with an icy spell.

The cutlery and bowls are disposable, and there are trashbags to clean up after yourself. She's not going to do it for you!

But hey. Who can say no to free food?

Comments

[babbylon]

It is! Mapo tofu!

[Gilgamesh laughs, at once delighted. Kirei would often cook this dish for him back at the church, so of course he has positive associations with it. And he loved spicy food even more than he loved sweets, so it brings a bright smile to his face.

Gilgamesh looks with favor upon Caren now, and it's clear he has no idea what he's getting into here.]

You made this for my visit? What a delightful girl! I accept your offering; it pleases me greatly.

[And once again, Gilgamesh assumes too much. But perhaps she's used to it by now.]

[showsnopiety]

[He was so...perky. Ugh, it made her want to knock him over the head with something. But, at least, she can burst his bubble a bit as she shoos him away from the stove.]

I didn't make this for just you. I'm experimenting, and I want to make this right, to my tastes in the future.

[She's also just. Going to nudge him towards the sink.]

Wash the ladle, while you're at it. If I wanted to make something specifically for you, I would have asked. Or attempted something Sumerian.

[She's used to his assumptions. But it doesn't take the delight away from trying to poke holes in his ego.]

[babbylon]

[Gilgamesh heads to the sink as directed, though he does toss some catty commentary over his shoulder.]

Hah! As if you could manage such a feat. Attempting to emulate my culture, and failing miserably... I'd kill you for the insult.

[Which isn't to say she would fail, necessarily, but it's posed as a challenge. She could try, yet it's clear Gilgamesh doesn't have much faith in her abilities. After all, mapo tofu wasn't exactly a complicated dish, so even if he liked it, it wasn't nearly enough to impress him.

Still...]

When will the food be ready? I'm eager for the finished product, so you should definitely hurry.

[showsnopiety]

[Of course he would. She sighed at him, even as she went back to checking on how things were coming along.]

Clearly you'd have to be my taste tester for all of it, and it would have to be constructive. Otherwise, I'd be better off shoving a wine bottle down your throat.

[He liked his wine, and frankly she would feel better after going through what would be likely hours of his snipping.]

Give it a few minutes. If you keep asking, you won't get any.

[babbylon]

[Gives it a few minutes... actually, it's more like a few seconds before he comes creeping back and starts hovering over her shoulder with a hopeful expression.]

But surely you would not deny your favorite Servant his proper portion. That is too cruel, even for you.

[For someone who was putting her through the ropes just to prove herself as Master, he sure was abusing their previous familiarity here. Then again, it's Gilgamesh, so he probably saw it less as abuse and more as his right to do whatever he pleased.

Flirtatiously, he reaches over to pull his fingers through a few threads of silvery hair.]

Although... thinking about it more... a private meal with you, hailing from my homeland, might be pleasant.

[showsnopiety]

[...she should have just given him a tub of ice cream and a spoon. Or did he just want her company?

She sighed, and glanced down at the bubbling pot. Ah, it was just thickening now...maybe if she could ask Adra, she'd find out if maybe there was a way to speed this up without using alchemy.]

I'd deny it in a heart beat.

[Deadpan, even as she glanced over her shoulder to stare at him. He might be familiar with it by now: she's completely unimpressed. He's really gotten comfortable with her since the hot springs, hasn't he? Maybe he just wanted to get laid.

Weirdo.]

Besides, I'm certain you would rather have the meal with someone else you've been courting. Adrasteius perhaps?

[babbylon]

I want to have it with you.

[...oh. That was rather direct, even for Gilgamesh.]

[showsnopiety]

[She just...turns around and squints at him. Coming on strong, aren't you Gilgamesh.]

So you can insult my cooking to my face?

[That would make sense. If this is the romance route she didn't by that extension pack.]

[babbylon]

So I might spend time with you.

[Forget romance. This was just straight up tsundere judging from that pout.]

[showsnopiety]

[She's just. Going to stare at him. Da hell Gil.]

Mm. I see.

[She's just going to turn away now. There are six different retorts she could think of but. Nope.]

[babbylon]

[Cool, cool.

Remember that sweet, almost fond threading fingers through her hair mere moments ago? Now he's just going to pull on it. Like a five-year-old.]

[showsnopiety]

[Oh my god Gilgamesh will you stop]

Gilgamesh.

[Just that. She's warning him.]

[babbylon]

[Tug, tug, tug! Now he's just having fun with it. Heheheh.]

Is there a problem?

[showsnopiety]

Yes.

[What a brat.]

You see, my fist is feeling a sudden attraction to your face.

[babbylon]

That brazen sort of fetish seems slightly extreme for this stage in our relationship.

[This sure took a Turn.]

[showsnopiety]

And yet, look at you, tugging my hair. You've become rather brazen yourself.

[She's going to end up hitting him anyway, isn't she.]

[babbylon]

Because you're supposed to be making my food, woman, and you're dawdling! Hurry up!!

[His affection blazed like a candle: intense, but very short-lived.]

[showsnopiety]

I am not, you perverted egomaniac.

Don't you know how to cook? The sauce has to thicken. Unless you want soupy mapo tofu?

[This really does feel like old times.]

[babbylon]

I most certainly know how!

[He most certainly doesn't.]

[showsnopiety]

Oh ho. The golden bull wouldn't know how.

It's a flaw in his education.

[babbylon]

[CRITICAL WEAKNESS DETECTED

ABORT, ABORT, ABORT]

Th... th... there's nothing flawed about me whatsoever! I'm perfect! Perfect, damn you!

[showsnopiety]

Perfect? You're being perfectly annoying.

[She points to the counter space.]

Over there. Now.

[babbylon]

[Caren employed a COMMAND SEAL! It's super effective!

Gilgamesh doesn't even try to protest. He just withers and wilts towards the directed area, and proceeds to wait patiently from that point onward. Well done, Caren, you have wrangled the wild Gil. If teased, he'll look away and refuse to answer.]

[showsnopiety]

[Where's that pokeball when she needs one, she can't capture a fainted Gil!

Thankfully he hasn't been left to wither all by his lonesome. Even if she should. It takes her a few moments, before she checks what's going on with the oven, before gathering a few things from the fridge and comes back. Fresh ingredients. For what? Who's to say. Something green, from the looks of it.]

I've thought that cooking may be a good idea for bishops to learn. Particularly those who make potions. However, a Queen can not stop learning.

[She smiles.]

Be thankful wench. I'm about to help you expand your knowledge.

[babbylon]

[Alright, no, there are certain degrees of insult Gilgamesh can tolerate and wench is not among them.]

Repeat yourself. Your words did not quite reach me.

[The killing intent in the air is near palpable... care to try that again, Caren?]