pawnstorm | Oh but don't bowl me over [open to all!]

Entry tags:

Oh but don't bowl me over [open to all!]

Who: Caren and everyone taking this job!
When: 05/05 - 05/31
Where: Halls of Glory
What: Small description or summary
Rating: Ranging from G, to PG-13, to R. After all, we're not safe for work.

A: General cleaning

To those who knew Caren...it might have been a bit of a surprise. That she was so good at this. Most of the time, she seemed to laze about, not asking for much, reading and seeing about her needs, and not anyone elses.

But here, she was very earnest. Almost too much so. She had scrubbed the courtyard until her hands were raw, and now...was bare foot, and stringing up the clotheslines. Anyone coming up while she's in the midst of this gets a warning.

"I hope your shoes are clean, or you're bare foot. Otherwise, I'll have to punish you for marring up this part of the courtyard." She didn't even look at the person as she said it. She was standing on a stool, barefoot, as she put up the linens. How did she see that person? Magic?

Maybe.

B: Bulletin Board

This part of the job was almost impossible. Really. The notes were tawdry, perhaps more so due to Heaven's feel, and the fact of the matter was, it was...rather something. She kept pausing in the midst of her tearing things down, and staring at some of them.

And sometimes, she even commented.

"No woman would want such a thing. It'd hurt her back." "If it's so big, how could he even fight?" "...ah, I wasn't aware of this pairing."

And so on.

C: Armory

Some of these things made no sense for uniforms. Some of it was all sorts of sizes, for one, but she could understand...at least some of them. After all, her room mates were a great example of various diverse sizes. It was all about getting everything in the right order though. She ended up having to play the game of match the sizes, and making it into a fairly neat pile. Although...some of them, she wasn't quite so certain as to what to do with them.

With a frown, she ended up holding a uniform top. Or, in this case, not much of a top; it looked as if it was designed to show the underboob of a woman. Was there...oh. She plucked it out, and frowned, finding a man's shirt, designed the same way.

...who in the world would or could wear a shirt like that.

D: Roof

"....heh."

Caren stood on the roof, seeing all too many crows. Instead of dressed to clean, however, she was wearing what could only be refeered to as her battle attire. And there was already some monday leftovers on her leg, and some on her back. She tried to be nice about it. This was a job better someone with charm, maybe even natural charm. Instead, things were about to come to a head.

She unfurled her shawl around her.

"It seems you're ready to become target practice." If she wasn't stopped, she would start using her weapon to whack crows too and fro off the roof. Or you can help her, or watch or...even get hit by cloth or a crow. Doesn't matter to her, really.

E: Where the Glory is

She wasn't sure how there was so much art. Really, she didn't think it did anyone any good. Just a lot of gaudy pieces, some of them that were quite untrue. She had been set to taste at polishing some of the pieces. But some of them...

She took a moment to look under a leaf or two, and made a noise.

"You wish." She muttered, before going back to work.

F: Shopping list

This was not how she wanted to spend her afternoon. She had things that she wanted to do, mostly in the way of sparring. And now...there was this.

With a glower, she came up to the next person who she came across, and shoved the list their way.

"Take this. I've no idea what half of these things are, and I do not wish to go shopping. It's easy colle. Enjoy."

G: Wild card!

If you don't see anything here that works for you, feel free to come up with something else!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Cracking open a treasure chest in the same armoury, Bolin expects to be greeted with something shining and gold, and perhaps some reveal music playing distantly in the background.

Instead, he's greeted with a cloud of dust that sends him into a coughing fit, and a maze of spiderwebs covering the garments hidden underneath. He frowns, not frightened by the prospect of a giant spider, but not all that keen to reach into the chest with just his hand. It's lucky then that he glances back at Caren, noticing what she happens to have in her hand. ]

Hey Caren, if you're done with that rag can I use it?

[ He is, of course, assuming the fanservice shirt is a rag. ]

[Bolin, for the last time you're not Link. Thanks for not breaking open all of the vases you found though, BTW.

But hearing Bolin's voice, she glanced over to him. Glanced back to the shirt. And back at Bolin.

NAAAAAAH.]

It's not a rag. It's a shirt.

[She dangles it in her pinched fingers so he can see what she's got in her grip. She even waves it a little to make it more obvious.]

Part of the uniform, if what I've noticed is correct.

[ ... Really?

Bolin squints at it a little, getting up from his crouch over the treasure chest to wander over to Caren and look curiously at the "shirt". Then again, apparently women wore underwear to the beach now so maybe it makes sense. ]

Oh, like a bra?

[ Except bras usually aren't so flimsy, at least in his experience. ]

[...Bolin you sweet innocent child. She looks at him, and ducks her head for a moment, letting her hair hide her face. No, she's not snickering. No she isn't.

(Yes she is).

But she brings up her face, and brings up the mens shirt, which is made the same way.]

No, not at all. Not unless you were to go to certain speciality shops. Hold it up to yourself. You'll see.

[ Bolin is not sweet and innocent!!

He just comes from a conservative time period; where he's certainly never seen women or men walk around in skimpy shirts like that. When prompted, he takes the slightly larger one and holds it up against his chest, not looking impressed. ]

I don't get it. This is a shirt?

[Compared to Caren, Bolin is sweet and innocent. (But that's the same for most people and not people.)]

Yes. Perhaps...give me a moment?

[She holds up her finger, and goes to stand behind the stacks of shirts so she can change from her uniform shirt to the underboob shirt. Sometimes it's better to just see such things on someone.

It doesn't take long, and Caren steps out.]

See?

[ Somehow, Bolin knows what's going to happen. There's only one reason that Caren would duck aside with that shirt, and given that he's already had a taste of the young woman's penchant for teasing.

But somehow, he still looks on with mild curiosity, and when she reappears.

Well, his face totally turns red but he does his best!! To remain professional. ]

Nope. [ NOPE. ] I still don't think that counts as a shirt!

Ah, but some would say so. Perhaps there are those who need such a short shirt, due to extra limbs or some such thing?

[It's not, really. Or so she thinks. But more importantly...she's not done yet.

She rocks on her feet, and makes a face. No, this shirt is not kind to her at all.]

Perhaps it's meant for more covert operations of some sort. Or that of a romantic assignation.

Okay.

[ Okay, that's probably enough of a demonstration, and Bolin just closes his eyes and turns away because it's getting a little weird. Just because it's been a few months since he's seen Opal doesn't mean that he can ogle pretty girls, with pretty hair, and striking eyes. Even if there was no Opal, girls don't deserve to be leered at!

Mind thus made up, he just frowns at the shirt in his hand. ]

Romantic assignation? Like undercover? [ Sure, he can buy that. ] But why would there be one for guys?

[And since she has no real reason to make him fluster further, she goes to change back to her normal clothes. Besides, it feels a little too chilly around here.]

Perhaps, yes. It could be for the very same reason for the men, to show off strong stomach muscles and pectorals.

[It's easy to change back and step out. She'll start looking for that rag for him to use now.]

[ Shoulder relaxing a little when he hears her change, he has to admit that her answer grabs his attention, and he looks down at his own body, poking his stomach a little. ]

Oh, are girls really into muscles?

[ He folds the shirt up, setting it in the pile with the rest of the "lightweight" armour. They're going to need more categories, since there's some legitimate armour in that pile. ]

I thought it was all about being mysterious and cool, and having a fancy haircut.

Some girls are. I've noticed that before. Some women are rather...enamored by the sight of certain muscles on certain parts of the male body.

[She's heard of some enjoying a good set of collar bones though. She's heard some weird things, eavesdropping on confessions though, so she might be the best source. Though Bolin's words made her huff gently.]

Some like that. But not all. Tell me Bolin-what does a man find appealing about a woman?

[It's actually not a trap. Mostly. She wants to know, even as she finds scrap fabric. That should be useful for dusting.]

[ Bolin hums, considering it, thinking not just about Opal but also his past girlfriends. ]

I dunno. [ He answers eventually. ] A mix of personality and looks, isn't it?

[ Then his expression changes to something sheepish, before he continues, ] Unless you're talking about guys in general? Like how a lot of guys like - [ uhh ] certain... body parts...

I believe the term you're looking for is breasts. Unless you mean the butt cheeks?

[She asks him, almost far too innocently, before she offers him the rag to clean with. That's what he wanted before, with the dusty chest.]

But you're more or less correct. There are various things that can attract one person to another.

I was trying to be subtle. [ That comes out as half a whine, though it's mostly to cover up his own embarrassment.

Bolin's not really shy about romance and sex, at least not with people he knows. But Caren's still mostly a stranger, she's also too comfortable being blatantly provocative. Bolin doesn't know if he's ever seen Korra and Asami discuss sex in front of him, or try to... be sexy.

Maybe he should try it sometime, broach the topic with Korra since she is his best friend, and all that he has from home. ]

But yeah, I was talking about breasts.

[ Admitted as he takes the rag, shuffling back to the chest to destroy the homes of millions of spiders. ]

I was just curious if girls had an equivalent.

But I like to hear you fluster.

[At least she's honest, even if she's blunt, embarrassing, and far too provocative than she should be. If she'd known about Korra, she would have encouraged him to discuss it with her. After all, he'd squirm less with a friend.

Though...an equivalent...Caren has to stop to consider the question seriously for a moment, before she goes back to sorting the various uniforms. The fan service ones are getting their own pile.]

It's possible? But I am not entirely certain. You would have to take a survey, I think.

[ That's weird, but it actually makes Bolin happy to hear that. It's likely just Caren's personality, but it makes Bolin feel like he's spending time with a friend, teasing one another and getting worked up about stupid things. It's fun and easy, and certainly takes the weight off of the reality of their being here.

He frowns at her, but otherwise doesn't complain as he starts clearing away cobwebs. ]

It's all right, I'm not that curious. [ It's not like he has any reason to try to appeal to women anymore anyway.

Just to keep up the conversation: ]

So, do you have a boyfriend?

[While she's at it, she might as well fold them. It'd be so much easier if these had some sort of tags like they have in modern stores. But she offers him an amused look when he decides he's not that curious...and he goes onto a funnier topic.

Caren can't help it; she bursts out laughing.]

No! No.

What?

[ He gives her a baffled look before turning his attention back. The cobwebs now cleared, he reaches out to take out the first item of clothing. It's a sailor school uniform—but of course, Bolin never having seen one before, thinks nothing of it. ]

What's so funny—oh, sorry. [ He corrects himself. ] Do you have a girlfriend?

[ Caren is laughing because she's gay, right? ]

[...okay, not the response she was expecting to here from him. She sees the sailor uniform, but she's too tickled by the idea of being in a stable relationship that she can't come up with some snide, smart ass remark about it.]

No, not that either.

[She waves a hand, snickering quietly. Nothing wrong with women-she can and would willingly couple with a woman. A relationship though...

That's funny.]

[ Taking out the skirt underneath, Bolin just assumes they're a matching set and puts them both aside.

What follows is just a speedo, and he's sincerely beginning to lose faith in this operation. ]

Then why'd you laugh?

[He could always ask her about it but...he wouldn't like the answers. She's just going to continue with her folding, still smiling. Her motions are so practiced that it's automatic. If he looks, he'll see for herself. Some people are martial artists. Some are martial folders.]

The idea of someone like me with someone else is absurd. I will not say that I can not love, as all humans, and human variants, do have the potential.

I should correct that. Being in a healthy relationship would not be possible. I am hollow, twisted, and cruel. It is best for all parties that I do not make the attempt.

I'm decent enough not to inflict myself as nothing more than a physical relief for any persons interested. At least that way I would be useful.

[ Bolin is way too Nickelodeon for this. He's completely forgotten his task of retrieving items from the chest, staring at Caren with open surprise with a speedo (incredible...) in his hands. It takes him a while to even make sense of what Caren's saying, since it's so unexpected, and he's trying to understand her tone to parse out how she feels, and what he should say—

But Bolin's just bad at reading people. ]

Who told you that? [ His response, both concerned and a little upset. ] Who told you that you were those things anyway?

[ There's just so much to address! ]

And what do you mean "physical relief" so you can be useful? Is that fun for you?

[She just smiles at him. He's rather sweet, but not everyone has a life, or had a life like hers. Which is really all for the better.

She's thankful for it even, as she continues to take, shake out, and fold shirts as an automatic response.]

Someone telling me these things would imply anyone would care.

[She's just opened a whole new world to him.]

I think you can get that. Fun may be stretching it. It can, however, be quite pleasant, if the other person knows what they're doing.

[ This is so upsetting to hear!!

Bolin replies on instinct, ] Care— what do you... [ He cuts himself off, expression more quiet and careful. ] I know it can be a lot better than "pleasant", what I mean is, is that a good reason to do it?

[ But he can't stop thinking about - ]

And you don't... have a family or anything?

c

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