DUNGEON ♛ HAVE A BALL (NOT LIKE THAT)

[boardmaster]

HAVE A BALL (NOT LIKE THAT)
17 FEBRUARY (VIOLA) 2016

To quell the rumors and (one-sided) bad blood between the Heroes and the regular army, the Prime Minister has decided to settle the matter once and for all with a snowball fight at the Colosseum. Located on top of a mountain at the edge of Caissa, winter seems to have transformed the Colosseum into a fortress of frost, complete with stairs of ice along the mountainside that lead up to the arena gates. It’s a full house—the seats are jam-packed with people from all over Blanc who’ve come to see our Heroes in action!

Once the Heroes step inside the arena proper, they’ll find that this fight isn’t just any children’s game. The arena has been converted into a huge mirror maze made of ice so polished, you can see yourself. Inside, the best of Blanc’s soldiers lie in wait. What gives? Maybe if you reach the center of the maze, you’ll find your answer…

But first, the rules!

1. Participants are divided into two teams: Heroes and the Blanc National Army. Only Heroes, Blanc soldiers, beasts and mechanical units in the arena are regarded as players. Just what else could be in here with you? Well...
   
   
2. Once a player gets hit by a snowball, they’re out! They will automatically be removed from the arena via trap door into the arena’s underground (please note that this will be a different level from the hypogeum in Option 2 and will lead directly to the outside). This rule does not apply to mechanical units.
   
   
3. Once a mechanical unit can no longer function, it’s out! It will NOT be removed from the arena until the game is over.
   
   
4. Hitting players with snowballs and disabling mechanical units are the only valid ways to earn points. Each player hit or disabled mechanical unit nets the attacking team one point.
   
   
5. Excessive destruction of Blanc property and intentional injury of other living players is not allowed. Violation of this rule will result in disqualification and automatically remove the player from the arena via trap door.
   
   
6. The use of non-magical weapons is not allowed. Violation of this rule will result in disqualification and automatically remove the player from the arena via trap door.
   
   
7. When the boss at the center of the maze can no longer function, the game will end.

Now get out there and have fun! Your reputation is on the line!

All OOC questions about the event may be directed to the thread below.

"Haha, wow, a full house! Our Heroes are quite lively today, aren't they? Hey, you! Gooood luuuuck!" "Don't waste your breath, Prime Minister. They'll need more than luck to best our own." “If anyone needs snowball making tips, I’ll be hereeee!” “Prime Minister…”

ONE ♙

Braving the ice mirror labyrinth is a test of both the body and the mind. The walls are 15 feet high and strangely impervious to fire magic. In fact, the entire maze is like a freezer, literally chilling everyone to the bone. If you ever get lost, we hope you brought something warm to keep you from freezing to the floor or the walls! It’s a very likely scenario, too; reflections in the ice do their best to both confuse your enemies and reveal their location. Unfortunately, the mirrors do their job so well, Heroes, soldiers, mechs and beasts alike are bumping into walls and walking (or sliding) in circles.

Yep, you read it: beasts. Scattered around the labyrinth are magical snow wolves, prowling around the labyrinth. They are most likely found in the outer rings, sniffing for our Heroes or chasing their own reflections. Don’t be fooled—taking them down is no walk in the park!

ENEMY ♟ Snow Wolf
Weak against Fire	Strong against Ice, Water	Immune to None
“Grrr…” These canine creatures are trained to chase off Heroes with their incredible SPEED. They are also capable of throwing SNOWBALLS with their tails and firing FREEZING ICE BLASTS from their mouths. One hit can turn anyone into a popsicle! In an attempt to one-up the yetis of Shatranj, Blanc has also trained these wolves to STAND ON THEIR HIND LEGS. Commander Lisbrand herself is said to have complained about the canine unit having too much time on their hands. Don’t fret! Although trained to attack, the wolves would never kill a Hero—especially if they bring RAW TREATS and BELLY RUBS!

TWO ♙

Everything is easy peasy, right? The good old dodge and throw that every child learns sooner or later. Except that whoever taught our Heroes didn’t include the possibility of enemies getting the jump on them. When Heroes least expect it, the trap doors bring reinforcements of soldiers and mechanical monsters into the fight from the underground. Better get ready to take them down!

Entering one of the trap doors—on purpose or accidentally—will lead to the hypogeum, another underground maze below the ice. Although made of stone, it’s filled with enough snow to supply both teams with ammo. Those who tried to memorize the labyrinth above in order to get around faster will have to redo their precious work: this maze’s layout is entirely different. If you thought Blanc’s budget wouldn’t allow for more ways to make you suffer, you’re wrong.

Traditionally used as the arena’s “backstage”, the hypogeum contains a huge network of tunnels and rooms used to hold both fighters and monsters. Wandering around the hypogeum will lead to the discovery of even more soldiers and mechanical monsters than in the ice maze above, so pay attention to who is coming up behind you and keep a steady supply of snowballs at hand.

ENEMY ♟ Blanc Soldier
Weak against None	Strong against None	Immune to None
“I thought what we had was special!” Fueled by envy, spite and suspicion, this soldier won’t go easy on you. Wearing LIGHT ARMOR to allow for FASTER MOVEMENT, this guy has absolute ZERO CHILL. He seems especially good at firing snowballs at A FAST RATE but his AIM seems to suffer every so often due to his GLASSES fogging up—a perfect opportunity to strike. Knocking off his glasses seems like a good strategy to win this, if you want to cheat a little. You might have to be careful, though. He is a trained soldier after all... If you manage to back him into a corner, you might just be at a range close enough for him to whip out his small but trusty SNOW BLASTER for a lucky shot. Even a guy with bad eyesight can get you from two feet away!

ENEMY ♟ Mechamon
Weak against Water	Strong against Lightning	Immune to Status Effects
“…vrrr…” Mechanical monsters proudly decorated with ‘MADE IN FISCHER’ logos. They come in a VARIETY OF SHAPES, from majestic bears to the exotic one-eyed ahriman. They move in a slightly CLUMSY manner and are prone to SLIPPING on the ice and snow. They shovel large amounts of snow into their oral cavities, which process them into (slightly lopsided and possibly with a dangerous spring sticking out) snowballs that reappear in their hands or mouths. Strike when they’re out of ammo! Be careful, since Mechamon limbs can still flail and leave bruises. They’re also fond of ATTACKING IN GROUPS, so Heroes might suddenly find themselves surrounded by packs, herds or flocks of these mechanical critters. Make sure to bring backup! If someone happens to get the bright idea to FRY the mech’s CIRCUITS, they’ll be bitterly disappointed. Rather than bringing the Mechamon to a halt, it will MOVE and ATTACK even FASTER than before. Hope you’re prepared for a barrage of snowballs!

THREE ♙

This is it. The final battle. Despite the utterly frosty weather, the very atmosphere seems to heat with anticipation. Muffled cheers from the crowd above are drifting down and the ground shakes as something begins to approach. This soldier must have had a Monday Mystery meal for breakfast, lunch and dinner to help them grow because no regular human could possibly be as tall or as heavy as whatever seems to be looming just around the corner. Cracks begin to appear on the ground and the sound of booming footsteps grows until…

An oversized robot shambles into the arena. Wait, what? Wasn’t this supposed to be between the Heroes and soldiers? There isn’t much time to fume and complain as the robot moves closer. Hoping it’s intelligent and can be reasoned with? Any attempt at talking to it will be met with loud, mechanical screeching and angry whirring noises. Diplomacy is out. Good thing the robot is very slow and won’t be able to cover a lot of distance very quickly—oh. Judging by the ridiculous leap our robot of the hour just made, distance could be a problem after all.

ENEMY ♟ CR-E MARK VII
Weak against Water	Strong against Lightning	Immune to Status Effects
“ENEMY DETECTED.” The CR-E MARK VII doesn’t waste time and springs right into action. Don’t let its entrance have fool you: this robot is FAST. Anyone hoping to get some distance from this thing will find themselves cursing the disadvantage of having shorter legs. Heavy, quick steps leave cracked and deep imprints in the ground and inattentive Heroes may trip and fall. Whoever is able to catch a glimpse of the robot’s palms will see the FLEUR DE LIS logo branded into them. “ANNIHILATION MODE.” Heroes who have come to a halt are being targeted, especially Pawns that are CASTING MAGIC. Those who know how to be bothersome pests should try and draw attention away from the casters unless they want to face a rampaging robot with fewer people to back them up. But watch out! Rather than bring snowballs to the fight like a good kid, this robot is here to prove its superiority to the human element; its long, spindly arms somehow manage to haul HEAPING HELPINGS OF SNOW, whirling the whole mess like a miniature, mobile avalanche to target Heroes! Occasionally, it JUMPS to create QUAKES and TREMORS, effectively causing Heroes to lose their balance, cancel their spells, or throw off their aim. The unlucky ones might even FALL INTO A TRAP DOOR jarred loose by all the commotion. “INITIATING BETA PROGRAM: EXECU-U-U-TI--vrrr.” The robot becomes HOT to the touch and those who specialize in hand to hand combat should take heed! Steam begins to rise from the hot metal, making the large ICE CRYSTALS on the ceiling slowly MELT and drip onto the participants below. Whenever a DROP hits the CR-E MARK VII, it will begin to thrash and its movements will become unsteady and rigid. The green lights in its face turn red, as loud and eerie mechanical whimpers fill the air. More observant Heroes may notice that the longer the battle goes on, the more HAPHAZARD and IRREGULAR its ATTACKS become. It will begin to flail more and act with much less coordination than before, partially due to the water but also because of circuits frying. “ERROR ERROR ERROR.” Once enough damage has been dealt, the robot goes into TOTAL SYSTEM OVERLOAD and starts indiscriminately hurling rocks, debris, ice, snow, and fellow mechanical creations in all directions without rest. Stay clear or end up with injuries Heroes never thought they’d get from a snowball match. Although it’s hard to dodge, the lack of openings makes it even harder to land a hit. Just when it seems as though all is lost (or about to be buried in a completely unprogrammed avalanche), COMMANDER LISBRAND suddenly jumps in out of nowhere, hurling the massive REMOTE CONTROL she’s been carrying towards the robot and then drawing her GUNS to fire upon CR-E MARK VII. “How many times have I told them I don’t need these buckets of junk to help me do my job?! How many times? You should all stop standing there catching flies and get moving! I want two on each flank right now! Did you hear me? I don’t want to see a hair in my line of fire!”

You thought one robot was bad enough? How about the fact that mechanical lackeys begin to show up halfway into the battle, throwing snowballs at everything and everyone?

ENEMY ♟ CR-E MARK VII-MINI
Weak against Water	Strong against Lightning	Immune to Status Effects
“Vrrr!” Meet the CR-E MARK VII-MINI units. You may think of them as CR-E MARK VII’s children. Actually, they’re support units originally intended to function as an auxiliary arsenal for CR-E MARK VII... But development was halted when the division ran out of funds. They’re now just a smaller-scaled version of their parent design--the result of desperate salvaging and a terrible naming sense. By itself, a single mini unit isn’t threatening. But when they get together, these little robots are a true menace, sneaking small rocks into their snowballs that can give unfortunate Heroes a brief STUN STATUS. Wow, did they all just multiply by two? Better shake off that dizziness before more of them hit you! What else do they do? Absolutely nothing! But don’t let your guard down; they’re smarter than they look! These mini units may often wait for an opportune moment to execute a COMBO with their parent unit. After all, defending the parent is the basis of their programming.

FOUR ♙

Despite having been in charge of the Heroes for less than a month, Lisbrand manages to seamlessly blend her attacks into their attempts to disable the CR-E MARK VII and its tiny lackeys. It’s almost as though she’s been watching you. She does seem to be at the Hall of Glory a lot, even if she hasn’t given a lot of orders so far…

Her attacks are measured and pinpoint-precise, crashing through the robot’s joints and hidden mechanisms with an efficiency almost as devastating as the force of the literal avalanches it was unleashing earlier. Finally, the MARK VII yawls backwards, arms pinwheeling comically, and one of its legs folds the wrong way… sending it to a crashing halt. The battle is done, the day is won!

“It’s a miracle this is only the MARK VII… But this is what you get for skimping on your tests.”

Blanc’s soldiers, despite knowing they’ve lost, immediately burst into a thunderous round of cheering. Some of them have even thrown their dignified guard hats into the air. Yells of, “Go Heroes!” and somewhat less appropriate hollers of, “I’m sorry, please marry me!” ring out from the crowd. The snowball match (if it could still be called one at all) is over and the bad blood is miraculously gone in a cloud of burnt circuitry and adoring gazes not quite directed towards our Heroes. It’s time to return home victoriously to Wednesday’s dinner of mutton stew and meat dumplings. Your loving floor nannies will approach shortly, carrying first aid and other necessities. Even they begin showering you with affection!

The Prime Minister appears to be ready to give the Heroes a congratulatory speech, but Lisbrand quickly interrupts to remind him about some business he needs to attend to. In the middle of speaking to the Prime Minister, she raises a hand to excuse herself, takes out her revolver and shoots at a screeching stray bat in one fluid motion. Although the bat falls, its body is nowhere to be found. What’s a bat doing in the arena, anyway?

After blowing the smoke from the barrel of her gun and returning it to its holster with a flourish that looks oddly deliberate considering her usual reserve, Lisbrand turns to the Heroes.

“I suppose some congratulations are in order. Nothing ever goes as planned on the battlefield—and that’s something you should be taking with you into the dungeons if you want to come out again. Prime Minister, if you would please, keep it short.”

“Congratulations! It was a victory hard fought and well won. I hope it was as fun for you as it was for the audience. Let’s do this again next year!”